Gabrielle Union Surrogate

Gabrielle Union is among the growing list of celebrities who due to one reason or another chose to use a surrogate as a means of bringing a child into the world, and are choosing to be very open about it. In a recent essay that was published by Time from Union’s new book titled “You Got Anything Stronger?” the actress goes into detail about the reasons for her choosing surrogacy, the experience and what she is anxious about.

Gabrielle’s Surrogacy Journey

The actress revealed that she had been through an adenomyosis diagnosis, and had suffered a lot of miscarriages in the course of trying to get pregnant. After having gone through more miscarriages than she could count, she said that her doctor told her that the best chance that she had for a healthy baby was through a surrogate. She reveals being devastated by the news as she had wanted the experience of being pregnant, the feeling of her body expanding and shifting in order to accommodate the baby growing inside of her. Gabrielle also said that another reason she was saddened by the news was that she had wanted to be pregnant after enduring years of public scrutiny for not being a mom. She also revealed that she was weighed down heavily by her husband, Dwayne Wade, previous relationships and the affair that he had in 2013.

The Surrogacy Process

Eventually, after she had agreed to it she had to do her research and get as much information about the whole process as she could find. She talked about learning that white intended parents preferred black and brown surrogates, as they were termed breeders, and being put off by it as she was a black woman herself. Eventually, she decided on an agency, the most ethical that she and her husband could find. They introduced her to a surrogate that fit her wants within two months, and they had a conversation over the phone. 

She discussed how the surrogate made all the right comments, how having her children had given her the gift of life, and how she wanted to share this gift with others. She talked about being anxious to meet the surrogate in person, about how it was the worst blind date ever, and how she waffled over what to wear to the meeting. The surrogate was a match after the meeting, and the couple received a positive pregnancy test in March of 2018. 

However, Union revealed how she was overcome by a surprising emotion at the first ultrasound. She revealed that while she was happy about the pregnancy, the growing baby bump revealed a visual manifestation of her failure, and how a part of her felt more worthless. She also said that she was hopeful that the life growing inside the surrogate would be spared, and that the heartbeat would continue to beat strong, long after hers had stopped.

The birth 

Before the baby was born, Union and Wade decided on the name Kaavia James. She revealed that she had made a list of baby names in her 20s and that the name had made it into every hopeful list that she had had. Kaavia James was born on November 7, 2018, following an emergency C-section and roughly 38 hours of labour. She talked about how she wanted to share the moment of birth with the surrogate Natalie and her husband, as it took all of their input in creating the baby.

After 

Nearly three years since the birth of her daughter, Union reveals that she has lingering questions about the entire process. She talked about how she would always wonder if her daughter would love her more if she had carried her herself. If the bond between them would be even tighter. The fears are not also limited to her role as a mother, as she talks about how she will always wonder if her inability to carry a child has put a limit on the love that her husband has for her. In sharing her story, Gabrielle Union hopes to open the conversation about surrogacy to other moms, hoping to destigmatize the topic and give hope to women who otherwise would be hopeless.

Definition of surrogacy 

Surrogacy is a fertility treatment where a woman that is referred to as the surrogate agrees to carry and deliver a child for an individual or a couple that is referred to as the intended parents. The surrogacy process is a very intensive process which is usually planned for before embarking on. It requires significant financial, emotional and psychological involvement. It has also been an increasingly common phenomenon for couples who are experiencing problems with fertility and same-sex couples who wish to have a genetic relationship with their offspring to embark on this surrogacy journey.

What are the types of surrogacy?

There are two types of surrogacy globally recognized; they are:

• Traditional surrogacy – This is a form of surrogacy where the surrogate gets pregnant with her own eggs, via an artificial insemination process or through an intrauterine sperm injection. The sperm used are gotten from the intended father. After getting pregnant, the surrogate then carries the baby to term, delivers and hands it over to the intended parents, ideally. There is a genetic link between the baby and the surrogate because her eggs were used in the fertilization process. This form of surrogacy is less expensive and less complicated but is not popular because due to that genetic link, the surrogate may have a legal claim on the baby if she changes her mind about handing the baby over to the intended parents.
• Gestational surrogacy – In this type of surrogacy, the embryo is created in vitro using the sperm and egg obtained from the intended parents or donors. The embryo, after being grown and tested in the lab for a few days, then gets transferred to the uterus of the surrogate who has been prepared for it. The surrogate then carries the baby to term and delivers it, then hands it over to the intended parents. There is no genetic relationship between the baby and the surrogate in this type of surrogacy, eschewing any legal hold or claim that the surrogate may make on the baby eventually. However, this type of surrogacy is more expensive, requires more resources and is more complicated to carry out.